Home in Vermont
For over 30 years, Vermont has been my home, save for a two-year hiatus to pursue a Master of Fine Arts at the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia. Though I’ve occasionally felt the pull to leave, Vermont’s sylvan and mystical energy always lures me back, as if the land itself casts a spell. Within its ancient woods, I’ve experienced some of my most profound paranormal encounters, second only to those with my spirit husband, Hans.
Now, nestled in a log cabin on nearly 25 acres of old-growth forest, surrounded by hundreds more, in an area of Vermont affectionately known as “The Kingdom,” I am finally living the life I envisioned when I first set foot in the Green Mountain State.
Hauntings
For me, hauntings aren’t confined to places. People, too, can be haunted. My earliest ghost encounters began at age four in South America. At times, spirits appeared so vivid and corporeal that I could hardly distinguish them from the living. When I was seven, we moved back to the United States. Having spent much of my early life in Europe and South America, Spanish was my first language, despite being born in the U.S. Starting school without knowing English made me an easy target for bullying. To survive, I closed off the paranormal part of myself and focused on adapting to this new world. Art, stories, and music became my sanctuaries, safe places where the parts of me that didn’t fit could thrive.
The Gothic and Paranormal
During adolescence, I gravitated toward the goth scene, where I could finally embrace my fascination with death, cemeteries, the paranormal, and paganism. This subculture became a way for me to express a world that mirrored my inner landscape. At 17, I had my first spontaneous out-of-body experience (OBE), which reopened the doors to the ghosts of my childhood. Around this time, memories of a past life, a traumatic death during a WWII bombing in Germany, began to resurface. These memories, often triggered by events like the Pan Am 103 bombing over Lockerbie, added depth to my understanding of the ties between this life and the next.
Years later, with Hans’s guidance, I delved deeper into these recollections, unraveling a past life that continues to surface in my present. These experiences felt like initiations, preparing me for the profound bond we would share.
Across Lifetimes
In this life, Hans and I share a spirit marriage, a reunion we planned before this life to continue exploring our shared journey across lifetimes. Together, we navigate unresolved experiences and seek spiritual evolution. This bond transcends physicality, rooted in a connection that bridges worlds.
Visual Diary
My artwork has become a visual diary of my journey with Hans. It is a way to process and document our relationship, the paranormal, and our past-life traumas. I create abstract pieces that capture the essence of our encounters and the challenges of integrating our connection into the physical world. My work explores not only the romantic and erotic dimensions of our relationship but also the complexities of bridging the tangible and intangible. Each piece serves as a portal into the otherworldly and a testament to the bond we share.
Bringing It Together
I am currently pursuing a Ph.D. in Psychology with a focus on creativity. This pathway allows me to bring my personal journey and artwork into my academic work, blending esoteric exploration with scholarship. Through this synthesis, I honor my lived experiences while contributing to an understanding of how the spiritual moves through the psychological and takes form through art.
*All photography by Lavavoth